Captain McLeach's New Plan
Captain McLeach's plan was foiled by Gil! Meanwhile, back at the ship, Kaa was slithering around the ship in circles. The captain was feeling ill because he had caught a cold from all that swimming along with a headache due to bumping his head on the wall. He has a hot water bottle on his head and a brown towel wrapped around him with his feet in a bucket of hot water. "That cursed Gil Nexdor!" McLeach sniffled, "Making a fool out of me!" All of a sudden, the captain sneezed loudly before splashing his head in the hot water. He lifted his head out and held it, groaning in pain. "Oh! my head!" Although his head hurt, it was nothing when came banging on the door, annoying McLeach. It was Mr. Snoops making that racket. He was hammering a "Do Not Disturb" sign on the door. A Chinese Hun named Shan Yu came in with a hot water kettle for Snoops to give to his captain. Shan Yu: Oh, a Hun's life is a wonderful life "Your hot water, Mr. Snoops!" Shan Yu called out before Snoops shushed him. "The poor captain has a splitting headache!" Snoops said, "We mustn't annoy him." He didn't notice McLeach open the door as he banged the hammer hard on the captain's head. The hammer vibrated with Snoops still holding it. McLeach, who was dazed, spun circles in his room and collapsed in his chair, completely dazed with one foot in the bucket and one foot out. Snoops entered the room with the kettle Shan Yu gave him and looked at Hook. Although we didn't see it, a dazed Captain Percival C. McLeach smiled goofily. "Well, captain, it's nice to see you smiling again!" said Snoops, as he put McLeach's other foot in the bucket, shook a thermometer, and put it in his mouth, "Brings back the good old days when we were living a healthy, normal life: scuttling ships, cutting throats! Oh, captain, why don't we put to sea again?" Then he put hot water from the kettle in the bucket. "You know, there's trouble brewing on the island - women trouble!" He didn't know that he was putting an awful lot of hot water in the bucket, making the water in the bucket too hot. "I wouldn't want this to go any farther, but the cook told me that the first mate told him that he heard that Gil has banished Kiara." At this, the thermometer broke because the water was so hot, and McLeach bolted from his chair, screaming in pain because his feet were red-hot. "WHOHOHOHOA!" Snoops fell backwards, and McLeach, who was very angry, grabbed him with the empty kettle over his eyes. "WHY YOU DODDERING IMBELICE, I--''' But then, his anger turned to surprise as he slowly lifted the kettle from his face. "Did you say Gil has banished Kiara?" "Aye-aye, captain. Yes." "But why?" "On account of Susan, captain. Kiara tried to do her in, but Gil saved her. Kiara's terribly jealous..." "Well, well!" McLeach said, with a scheming look in his eyes. "That's why we ought to leave, captain," said Snoops. "This ain't no place for a respectable pirate." But McLeach had no attention of leaving Neverland yet after getting rid of Gil. Then McLeach had an idea. "THAT'S IT, SNOOPS! THAT'S IT!" "I'm glad you agree, captain." Snoops said, thinking they might be leaving. "Quick," McLeach said, letting the towel fall on the floor. "My coat! My best overcoat!" "Aye, aye, sir," Snoops said, as he dressed McLeach in his coat. "The sooner we get going, the better." Snoops moved McLeach to the mirror. "Ah, yes, a jealous female can be tricked into anything. My case of hooks!" he ordered, whacking Snoops in the face. "Aye, aye, captain," said Snoops, as he got the captain's case of hooks. "Here you are, sir. Your Sunday set, sir." McLeach took off his silver hook and replaced it with a gold one. He also put a shining ruby ring on the hook. "If we impress the lioness cub, convince her we're eager to help her, the wench may chart our course to a certain hiding place." "Our best hiding place is the Spanish Main, sir." Snoops informed him, as he walked out the door, "I'll set our course..." But McLeach grabbed the fat man with his hook. "And where do you think you are going?" McLeach asked, poking his nose. "To tell the animal boys we sailed the tide, sir." McLeach shook his head. "Uh-uh. You will go ashore, pick up Kiara, and bring her to me." Then he threw him down and yelled, "UNDERSTAAAAAAAND??????????!!!!!!'''" The force of his yell, knocked Snoops into his rowboat. "Aye, aye, sir." Snoops said, as he rowed to the island. Category:Fan Fiction